Going Green

Gogreen

Chances are that the last time you were told to go to the bathroom was when you were 9 or 10 years old. So what will it feel like the first time an airline staff member instructs you to relieve yourself before boarding a plane? Well, it would appear that you may soon find out. Nippon Airways, which operates in and out of Japan, has already begun asking its passengers to use the restroom before traveling, and the reason could not be more ludicrous. Apparently, it is the airline’s belief that doing so will reduce its carbon footprint. Empty bladders, it says, makes for lighter passengers, and lighter passengers means less fuel use.

This is no joke. Nippon officials argue that if people obey the airline’s no-potty policy, it will result in a five-ton reduction in carbon emissions over the course of 30 days. They even figured out that, based on an average human bladder capacity of 15 ounces, any given set of 150 passengers who have not done their business before boarding adds an additional 63.7 kilograms to the plane’s weight. While the policy is intended as an experiment to last one month, Nippon will extend it if it’s well-received by passengers. A number of other airlines are considering following suit, which means that you, too, might someday be asked to go before getting to go anywhere.

By Bobby Maddex, from Salvo issue 11. Subscribe today!

One thought on “Going Green

  1. To continue this “logic” ad absurdum, they should also suggest that passengers fast — or at least “purge” — before flying. Or how about requiring them to fly naked? Think of all the carbon emissions to be saved! Of course, if Nippon Air really wants to do the climatically-kind thing, they should quit flying and turn their airplane propellers into wind turbines …

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